There was a redback on the toilet seat
when I was there last night
I didn't see him in the dark
but boy I felt his bite
I jumped high up into the air
and when I hit the ground
that crafty redback spider
wasn't nowhere to be found
I rushed in to the missus
told her just where I'd been bit
she grabbed the cutthroat razor
and I nearly took a fit
I said, "Just forget what's on your mind
and call the doctor please
Cos' I've got a feeling that your cure
is worse than the disease
There was a redback on the toilet seat
when I was there last night
I didn't see him in the dark
but boy I felt his bite
And now I'm here in hospital,
a sad and sorry plight
and I curse the redback spider
on the toilet seat last night
I can't lie down, I can't sit up
And I don't know what to do,
And all the nurses think it's funny
But that's not my point of view.
I tell you its embarassing,
And that's to say the least,
That I'm too sick to eat a bit
While that spider had a feast.
And when I get back home again
I tell you what I'll do,
I'll make that redback suffer
For the pain I'm going through.
I've had so many needles
That I'm looking like a sieve,
And I promise you that spider
Hasn't very long to live.
There was a redback on the toilet seat
when I was there last night
I didn't see him in the dark
but boy I felt his bite
And now I'm here in hospital,
a sad and sorry plight
and I curse the redback spider
on the toilet seat last night