EVERYONE
We're serving up fresh beats for breakfast lunch and dinner
Eat some of our beats they'll keep you warm all winter
Will.i.am
We're eating up them beats and going Nom nom nom
FERGIE
I'm putting them in my tummy cus they're yum yum yum
[Everyone goes off on a crazy riff at the same time]
Will.i.am
Allright stop!
This is getting out of hand
there's too many people in this band
It's time for some band interviews
I have to fire some of you
TABOO
My name is Taboo I'm the weird Mexican
Will.i.am
I don't recall ever letting you in
Will.i.am
Walk me through your average day
And list the instruments that you play
TABOO
I play no instruments persay
But I drop the beat and then say HEY!
Will.i.am
When you say you drop the beat do you mean you drop it literally
TABOO
Ummmmm nah that's the Deejays job. I drop it figuratively
I also pace around the stage and strike a menacing pose
On Saturdays I do the shopping and wash the bands clothes
Will.i.am
Okay apl.de.ap what the hell do you do?
apl.de.ap
Well, I'm the other black guy. Y'know the one who's not you
Apl.de.ap
I bring the heat and I drop the beat
When you say something I just repeat like:
Will.i.am
What!
apl.de.ap
What!
Will.i.am
Huh?
Apl.de.ap
Huh
Will.i.am
Stop it!
Apl.de.ap
Stop it!
Will.i.am
Ahhhh
Apl.de.ap
Ahhhh
Apl.de.ap
Then I make noises like ping pow zapp, HA HA
Will.i.am
Apl.de.ap more like apl.de. crap
FERGIE
Fergalicious in the building say what?
Fergali...
Will.i.am
Sit your ass down and shut up.
Now apart from your looks what do you bring to the table?
FERGIE
When it comes to writing hooks you'll find that I am quite able
Don't Stop Believin'
Apl.de.ap and TABOO
Don't stop Don't stop
FERGIE
Cus we're dancing on the ceiling
Will.i.am
Have you had plastic surgery?
FERGIE
No, my lips got stung by bumble bees
Will.i.am
Did you just have an accident?
FERGIE
No that's just some yellow sweat
Will.i.am
Okay, Fergie your fired cause you ripped off Journey
Apl.de.ap its time to press apple z
Taboo you can stay but you can't sing any more
I need someone to mop Fergies pee off the floor
TABOO
Yes!
Don't stop believin'
Will.i.am
Don't sing, just mop
TABOO
Cus we're dancin' on the ceiling.
Will.i.am
What?
TABOO
Nothing.