You, human.
You, minnow.
Human. No Fish.
Human. No Fish. I’m so hungry.
People are afraid of oceans
They just put on sunscreen lotions
And watch waves for sudden motions
Because of outdated notions
That a shark’s an evil creature
(He’s a shark)
Taught by everyone’s school teacher
When you see our dorsal feature
Save your kid before we reach her.
(A great white, outta sight,
and he hasn’t eaten yet.)
Don’t judge a book by its cover
Even though we seem to hover
We’re no worse than what’s above her
I’m no fighter, I’m a lover
(He’s a shark)
All I want is to be eating
Something meaty, something bleeding
It’s the only thing I’m needing
So it always bears repeating
I’m not getting any thinner
If I’m hungry, you’re my dinner.
The beach should be closed.
But the mayor
(money hungry man)
Doesn’t want it to be closed.
(This just spells out disaster)
I’ve hunted sharks more
I know what’s in store
I dealt with them for the second world war
No introduction
follow instruction
any obstruction leads to destruction
So let’s all tempt fate
let’s get the shark bait
before it’s too late
and he gets irate
(I’m not afraid.
In the water, I’ll wade.
Oh no! I forgot my band-aid)
I would like you all to please vote
On who wants to get in my throat
But when you come for me take note
Of what you’re missing, And I quote
You’re gonna need a bigger boat.
More than just one yellow barrel
Really thick fishing apparel
You better hope I was sterile
(He’s a shark.)
Or the world will be in peril.
As the sun seems to get hotter
You’ll think its safe in the water
It’s our ocean, you’re a squatter
You are a lamb to the slaughter
Others gladly will take my place
To wipe out the human rat race
Just so you know I’ve made my case
I want you to look at my face
Rather than have me stand trial
I will die in movie style.
Humans are so versatile
But this S.O.B. can smile.
BANG!
